The Anxious Person
A person with an anxious personality experiences an overreaction to threatening stimuli in his or her environment, resulting in the body having a greater stress response than another person might have to the same event. The anxious person is less able to tolerate the normal uncertainties about the future and the "dangers" that may arise. This may be about external events - such as terrorist attacks or planes crashing - or relationship or health issues: "What if he doesn't really love me?" or "What if I've got cancer?"
People with anxious personalities tend to have a general, although often subliminal, belief that the world is a dangerous place and that they must always be on guard to prevent or control any threat to their body and psychological well-being. Their thoughts are frequently dotted with 'what ifs' and 'maybes'.
Their behavior is motivated by an attempt to reduce or get rid of the stressor that is causing them to feel stressed. For example, the anxious person may always say, "Yes" if asked to take on extra work by the boss and is thought to be obliging. It could be however, that he is anxious about being criticized or being disapproved of if he says, "No".
An anxious person may not be aware the he is experiencing anxiety. He feels physical discomfort and experiences gut, bowel problems, and immune and nervous system problems, which he thinks are physical problems needing testing and treatment, rather than recognizing that it may have something to do with his cognition (thinking).
Yet every fearful or negative thought (which then becomes the threatening stimulus) causes the body to produce some adrenalin, a stress chemical that prepares the body for fight or flight in the event of the stimuli actually being dangerous. The adrenalin stores in the muscles, maintaining a sense of "readiness" should the danger ever present. The feeling of stress or being "on guard" can result in one small event triggering an intense response due to the build up of adrenalin in the body. Others may see this as an overreaction.
It is quite common for an anxious person to also be a sensitive person, prone to worrying. Sensitive people have a brain that is always on guard to any threat, resulting in the body producing adrenalin at the slightest suggestion of there being any "danger" in the environment. This could be in reality an external stimulus (heat, noise, unpleasant smells, bright lights, scratchy clothing, food with strange textures) or a threat from internal appraisals (feeling disapproved of, disliked or criticized).
An anxious person may have a strong physical/adrenalin response (called flooding) to irritable tones, raised voices or a suggestion of conflict in their environment, regardless of whether or not the conflict is directed at them. They may startle easily.
The nervous system, if aroused by adrenalin, gives a person the anxious feeling even before he or she can rationalize the situation. Once the brain recognizes that anxious feeling it stays on guard for the danger and the thoughts in the head are usually 'what if' this and 'what if' that. Typically the thoughts focus on the person's vulnerability at the time and that may be related to something about their health, finances, relationships, children, work, being disliked, being inadequate. The brain is looking for some danger to justify the fear feeling.
Best wishes, Karen Gosling
People with anxious personalities tend to have a general, although often subliminal, belief that the world is a dangerous place and that they must always be on guard to prevent or control any threat to their body and psychological well-being. Their thoughts are frequently dotted with 'what ifs' and 'maybes'.
Their behavior is motivated by an attempt to reduce or get rid of the stressor that is causing them to feel stressed. For example, the anxious person may always say, "Yes" if asked to take on extra work by the boss and is thought to be obliging. It could be however, that he is anxious about being criticized or being disapproved of if he says, "No".
An anxious person may not be aware the he is experiencing anxiety. He feels physical discomfort and experiences gut, bowel problems, and immune and nervous system problems, which he thinks are physical problems needing testing and treatment, rather than recognizing that it may have something to do with his cognition (thinking).
Yet every fearful or negative thought (which then becomes the threatening stimulus) causes the body to produce some adrenalin, a stress chemical that prepares the body for fight or flight in the event of the stimuli actually being dangerous. The adrenalin stores in the muscles, maintaining a sense of "readiness" should the danger ever present. The feeling of stress or being "on guard" can result in one small event triggering an intense response due to the build up of adrenalin in the body. Others may see this as an overreaction.
It is quite common for an anxious person to also be a sensitive person, prone to worrying. Sensitive people have a brain that is always on guard to any threat, resulting in the body producing adrenalin at the slightest suggestion of there being any "danger" in the environment. This could be in reality an external stimulus (heat, noise, unpleasant smells, bright lights, scratchy clothing, food with strange textures) or a threat from internal appraisals (feeling disapproved of, disliked or criticized).
An anxious person may have a strong physical/adrenalin response (called flooding) to irritable tones, raised voices or a suggestion of conflict in their environment, regardless of whether or not the conflict is directed at them. They may startle easily.
The nervous system, if aroused by adrenalin, gives a person the anxious feeling even before he or she can rationalize the situation. Once the brain recognizes that anxious feeling it stays on guard for the danger and the thoughts in the head are usually 'what if' this and 'what if' that. Typically the thoughts focus on the person's vulnerability at the time and that may be related to something about their health, finances, relationships, children, work, being disliked, being inadequate. The brain is looking for some danger to justify the fear feeling.
Best wishes, Karen Gosling
About the Author:
Karen Gosling has helped thousands of people in more than 30 years to understand their own and their partner's emotional style. Her 1-hour "Surviving Emotional Style" DVD and audio CD with transcript will show you how. You will find nearly everything you need to know about managing your emotional style so that your relationships aren't impacted by anger or anxiety. Go to: Surviving Emotional Style
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